Local South Asian Americans talk at a "Chai Chat" held in downtown Boston.

BOSTON — "Are you an ABCD or a FOB?" asked Manoshi Vin to a crowd gathered on leather sofas and drinking chai on a recent chilly Sunday afternoon.

Thus began the year's first "Chai Chat," held at News Café and Lounge in Boston and hosted by the Boston chapter of the Network of South Asian Professionals, a nonprofit organization known for its happy hours, charitable events and social gatherings such as this one.

"Being labeled a FOB [Fresh Off the Boat] or an ABCD [American-Born Confused Desi] is something we've all battled at some point in our lives," explained Vin, the network's social chair.

As an icebreaker to the social gathering, all attendees took turns stating their names and if they were an American born confused Desi or fresh off the boat.

The diverse group of 40 — made up of well-heeled doctors, researchers, engineers, lawyers and financiers — introduced themselves and chose an affinity, some happily, others hesitantly. Among those South Asians sitting in the crowd was Chai Chat's guest of honor, Sunil Lala, author of "American Khichdi."

Lala, a full time IT consultant with MIT Lincoln Labs and a Hindustani Times writer, shared a passage from his new collection of essays and offered commentary on cultural identity.

Lala took the reigns of the conversation right off the bat. "The stress is put on the word confused," he said, speaking about the acronym ABCD. "Confusion gets created during the formative years when you are seeing a different culture outside your home."

The conversation quickly came to life, with everybody speaking freely and without hesitation.

"First of all, I think FOB needs to be changed to FOP because they don't come on boats but on planes," joked Usha Govindarajulu.

"But I really don't think we should have these terms anymore. It is sad that in the year [2008] we still have these categories," said Govindarajulu. 

The debate was just heating up. Moderator Vin encouraged the group to dig deeper and address the complexity that lies behind these loaded terms.

Rajesh Fotedar, a 32-year-old attorney from Marlborough, spoke poignantly of his relatives, many of whom left India for a new life abroad, and in turn continually seek a connection with their homeland.

"They came to America for a better life, but spend the whole rest of their lives here reclaiming India," said Fotedar.

Following the natural ebb and flow, the conversation progressed to the concept of holding on to a drifting culture.

"Immigrants are reclaiming their culture from Zee TV," said Fotedar, half in jest and half in truth. The notion of Zee TV and Bollywood being synonymous with Indian culture brought up more debate.

One young woman, who was born and raised in a middle-class, primarily white suburb in England, argued that while she cares little for Bollywood she feels deeply connected to her culture.

"It's an inside kind of thing," she said. "I still feel Indian even though I may not fit the criteria."

Lala, pointed out: "People that grew up here in the United States feel further away from the culture and feel a need to hold onto it."

Binita Patel, former vice president of the group, first introduced the concept of Chai Chat in 2005.

"We had called it Chai Chat right from the start," explained Patel, 26, of Framingham. "It was a little Desi, a little American all mixed into one — just like many of us."

The goal is to create an open forum for South Asians to discuss current issues pertaining to their culture in a friendly environment, she said.

"I noticed there was a significant segment of the Indo-American crowd that just wasn't interested in the bar and lounge scene," said Patel.